Friends, How to capture the essence of the largeness of the tiniest details that completely reinvent our days is sometimes—beyond words. I’m writing to you from a different state, address and perspective than I last wrote. This past month, in my mind I’ve written you a hundred thoughts. My hands, however, have been a wee preoccupied; working to unpack, and recreate the warmth of “home” for my family of eight. Today,.. Read More
Let’s Have a Rough Week Together: How To Only Possibly Change Everything
When I was giving a lesson on the birds and bees before 7:30 Monday morning it should have occurred to me: this week would be akin to a scab being torn off involuntarily. But it didnt really. Maybe the next morning should have done it for me when I was crawling…more like prowling, on the bathroom floor around 6 a.m. lunging after a bug that had disturbed my youngest son’s.. Read More
Aching with the Yearning: Learning the Love of God through my Children’s Eyes
“There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.” —Vincent Van Gogh What could a life be, dedicated to intimately knowing one thing? What if that one thing is the love of God? (Dishes need washing again, laundry waiting to be put away, sobbing little heart needs me to hold him.) What if I love like the King of the Universe, Creator of heaven and earth? …on earth as it.. Read More
Searching For Beauty
I’ve been searching fierce for beauty for weeks now. Physically, halting for poetry and photo-taking of the dogwood trees. Drinking tea in the afternoon and listening to stories, watercoloring with my budding artists and stopping, to listen: this was my search party. My war-cry looked like words spilling out the poems that fill me up in the journals. I’ve been listening to the quiet and the breeze. I heard the.. Read More
Wanted: Faithful Mommas Who Know It’s Not About Us
Do not be afraid of a life of sacrifice… I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts then there is no hurt, only more love. — Mother Teresa Funny, Not Funny Faithfulness is a funny word to try to wrap our minds around and then at times, not very funny at all. Like the faithfulness of newborn baby diaper “blow-outs”. Whew, I mean, I was laughing.. Read More
Exploring His Presence to Live More Present in 2016, Part 3 (OR: When burning letters set my heart on fire again)
I was wrestling with a seemingly impossible barrier in my heart as I tried to sleep one night when somewhere between sleep and wake I saw the words I AM. My mind’s eye followed the image and watched the letters burn off in flame, yet remain. Within moments and breaths, and without fully knowing how or when, the barrier had fallen. Within the name, I AM, I finally understood the answer to.. Read More
I Choose Joy Because God
It’s what the children know without an explanation or need for one. It’s what they don’t know too and why they need me to know it. Joy is a choice. The often cited “research” results that children laugh 400 times a day compared to the 17.5 times of an adult has been revealed as an urban myth. However, as a mom to several young children I can vouch that there.. Read More
Living With the Ache for Home
Who knew I would speak with not one, but two of my children, between the ages of 3-14, this week about their future spouses, their future lives. I found in my boys a longing to know their place in this world. How surprised I was to come across their tiny but true nonetheless, ache. I perceived in them, ache. They are aching for their wholeness, and so am I. I didn’t.. Read More
Burnt Toast: A Prayer, (and poetry too)
Wouldn’t it be just the way of it? The morning I have this wonderful break-through thought, a certain breath from heaven kind-of-thought that transforms my affections and makes me ache with the longing to honor my God even as I cook breakfast for my family, all filling me up warm and bright inside—I burn the toast.
I don’t mean burn in the toaster kind-of-burn the toast, I mean, “Everybody open the windows before the fire alarm goes off!”, kind-…
A Choice: A Prayer
It was the middle of the night. One of the little one’s had a potty accident. Walking and working with my eyes barely slit open, I had this hope that if I didn’t open them any further, somehow, that would make them easier to close again just as soon as I could get my head back to my pillow. I didn’t want any big thoughts here, just: get it done, go back to sleep. Sometimes it works, but not this night…