STAY, in the Breath

letters from a writer & photographer's journey

The Liminal Space of Prayer

Friends, How to capture the essence of the largeness of the tiniest details that completely reinvent our days is sometimes—beyond words. I’m writing to you from a different state, address and perspective than I last wrote. This past month, in my mind I’ve written you a hundred thoughts. My hands, however, have been a wee preoccupied; working to unpack, and recreate the warmth of “home” for my family of eight. Today,.. Read More

Let’s Have a Rough Week Together: How To Only Possibly Change Everything

When I was giving a lesson on the birds and bees before 7:30 Monday morning it should have occurred to me: this week would be akin to a scab being torn off involuntarily. But it didnt really. Maybe the next morning should have done it for me when I was crawling…more like prowling, on the bathroom floor around 6 a.m. lunging after a bug that had disturbed my youngest son’s.. Read More

Aching with the Yearning: Learning the Love of God through my Children’s Eyes

“There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.” —Vincent Van Gogh What could a life be, dedicated to intimately knowing one thing? What if that one thing is the love of God? (Dishes need washing again, laundry waiting to be put away, sobbing little heart needs me to hold him.) What if I love like the King of the Universe, Creator of heaven and earth? …on earth as it.. Read More

Searching For Beauty

I’ve been searching fierce for beauty for weeks now. Physically, halting for poetry and photo-taking of the dogwood trees. Drinking tea in the afternoon and listening to stories, watercoloring with my budding artists and stopping, to listen: this was my search party. My war-cry looked like words spilling out the poems that fill me up in the journals. I’ve been listening to the quiet and the breeze. I heard the.. Read More

Exploring His Presence to Live More Present in 2016, Part 3 (OR: When burning letters set my heart on fire again)

I was wrestling with a seemingly impossible barrier in my heart as I tried to sleep one night when somewhere between sleep and wake I saw the words I AM. My mind’s eye followed the image and watched the letters burn off in flame, yet remain. Within moments and breaths, and without fully knowing how or when, the barrier had fallen. Within the name, I AM, I finally understood the answer to.. Read More

I Choose Joy Because God

It’s what the children know without an explanation or need for one. It’s what they don’t know too and why they need me to know it. Joy is a choice. The often cited “research” results that children laugh 400 times a day compared to the 17.5 times of an adult has been revealed as an urban myth. However, as a mom to several young children I can vouch that there.. Read More

Living With the Ache for Home

Who knew I would speak with not one, but two of my children, between the ages of 3-14, this week about their future spouses, their future lives. I found in my boys a longing to know their place in this world. How surprised I was to come across their tiny but true nonetheless, ache. I perceived in them, ache. They are aching for their wholeness, and so am I. I didn’t.. Read More

Burnt Toast: A Prayer, (and poetry too)

Wouldn’t it be just the way of it? The morning I have this wonderful break-through thought, a certain breath from heaven kind-of-thought that transforms my affections and makes me ache with the longing to honor my God even as I cook breakfast for my family, all filling me up warm and bright inside—I burn the toast.

I don’t mean burn in the toaster kind-of-burn the toast, I mean, “Everybody open the windows before the fire alarm goes off!”, kind-…

A Choice: A Prayer

It was the middle of the night. One of the little one’s had a potty accident. Walking and working with my eyes barely slit open, I had this hope that if I didn’t open them any further, somehow, that would make them easier to close again just as soon as I could get my head back to my pillow. I didn’t want any big thoughts here, just: get it done, go back to sleep. Sometimes it works, but not this night…