STAY, in the Breath

letters from a writer & photographer's journey

Aching with the Yearning: Learning the Love of God through my Children’s Eyes

“There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.” —Vincent Van Gogh What could a life be, dedicated to intimately knowing one thing? What if that one thing is the love of God? (Dishes need washing again, laundry waiting to be put away, sobbing little heart needs me to hold him.) What if I love like the King of the Universe, Creator of heaven and earth? …on earth as it.. Read More

Why We Create: The Love of God in this Burning Wilderness

The littlest was howling. He hurt his knee. He came running. Tucking himself next to me, he took my long skirt and draped it over his wound, holding it tight. Eyes closed tight too, unaware how he was warming my heart, he cuddled into my lap. That kind of smile that comes from deep down broke out all over my tired face. It comforted me that I could comfort him, even with.. Read More

Searching For Beauty

I’ve been searching fierce for beauty for weeks now. Physically, halting for poetry and photo-taking of the dogwood trees. Drinking tea in the afternoon and listening to stories, watercoloring with my budding artists and stopping, to listen: this was my search party. My war-cry looked like words spilling out the poems that fill me up in the journals. I’ve been listening to the quiet and the breeze. I heard the.. Read More

Kick “Perfect” to the Curb, Where it Belongs

I have often made the mistake in my thinking and operating as a mom that if I am not doing it “perfectly” then I am not doing well enough. The other day I sat around the table with my kids, after a previously sad day. I could feel we were all still on the mend. The day before one of my children just flat out decided there was something he.. Read More

Dear Mom Who Needs Rest (OR: How to be a Super Mom)

I’ve got a whole lot of hurting hearts on my heart as I write today. People with grief I don’t know how to touch are on my mind. People who find resonance in Jeremiah’s words when he said, “I wish I hadn’t even been born.” I’m praying and I’m wondering what can be done. I’m praying for that illuminating moment we all need from time to time, that hand beyond.. Read More

Exploring His Presence to Live More Present in 2016, Part 3 (OR: When burning letters set my heart on fire again)

I was wrestling with a seemingly impossible barrier in my heart as I tried to sleep one night when somewhere between sleep and wake I saw the words I AM. My mind’s eye followed the image and watched the letters burn off in flame, yet remain. Within moments and breaths, and without fully knowing how or when, the barrier had fallen. Within the name, I AM, I finally understood the answer to.. Read More

Burnt Toast: A Prayer, (and poetry too)

Wouldn’t it be just the way of it? The morning I have this wonderful break-through thought, a certain breath from heaven kind-of-thought that transforms my affections and makes me ache with the longing to honor my God even as I cook breakfast for my family, all filling me up warm and bright inside—I burn the toast.

I don’t mean burn in the toaster kind-of-burn the toast, I mean, “Everybody open the windows before the fire alarm goes off!”, kind-…

The Liminal Space of a Woman with Child

When you transition from knowing your own writing voice only within the confines of personal journal pages and letters to family and friends out into the public domain, you wonder what it will be like. I’m only a couple of years into this experiment and here’s what it is like for me: freedom.

I’d written an article or two over the years that reached beyond my personal sphere but nothing like this last year. It feels vulnerable too, but that feeling pales in comparison to the joy of finding my walking legs after the work of crawling. The sense of freedom only enlarges when…

Authenticity: a Prayer

Being authentic doesn’t mean just being real about the struggle, it’s seeing beyond the struggle to what is most real. Welcome to Wednesday—I’m sure it’s already been a big week for us all. Feeling exhausted before the day even began, here’s my heart prayer this morning: I desperately want to live in the awareness of the now and the beautiful strength You can bring to it. I don’t want to.. Read More